Dart Lessons With Louie The Lip
On the way home from Saturday lunch out, we made an extraordinary discovery. Someone had the gall to open what looked like a respectable pub just a few miles from out home. After an interminably long week of waiting to experience the Kingshead Pub, the time had come, so we packed up the Fat Cats – our darts, dart accessories, and their case, and hied ourselves over for a pint.
How Serendipitous!
Now, we had no idea whether the Kingshead had dartboards or not, but upon making our grand entrance, Tammy said, Look. I raised my eyes to meet the vision of two unsullied, gleaming dart boards, in a sea of dark woods and soft light, straight ahead. This had potential.
At times we are not so stupid, so prior to our first visit we went online to thoroughly inspect their beer menu. Although it was no surprise when we arrived, that they had beers we loved, it was still heartening to see they were not liars. With high spirits, fine IPAs, and darts, the evening began.
Louie The Lip
Not half way through our first game of Cricket, we were accosted by a patron. I say accosted because although we fully expect to have conversation with strangers at a pub, we do not expect unsolicited lessons in dart technique. Wearing a conspicuous corno or Italian horn necklace, this olive-skinned, stout and gregarious 60+ charmer made it his mission to assist us in becoming better dart players.
No, you’re bringing your hand too high. You throw too hard. Look, like this. He demonstrates with head slightly cocked back and to the right, throwing hand coming out from under his chin and left hand hanging dead beside him. Oddly graceful and a tad disturbing, yet effective.
And it goes right where you want. Go ahead. Try it.
He was politely thanked and we set to employing his teachings while he returned to the board next to ours by himself, nearest the bar. We figured that would be the end of it. But he continued to monitor and occasionally tweak our form. Louie had trouble concealing his dismay at Tammy’s stutter-jump release.
Don’t do this. He mimicked my wife’s hop just before the dart left her hand, then energetically and annoyingly repeated himself several times to be sure we understood.
Shoot with your wrist. Don’t cock your arm. Look. Let me show you. He puts his left hand on my back and his right under my throwing elbow making my bicep parallel with the floor. I uncharacteristically allowed several repetitions of this procedure to meet his satisfaction.
Next, he had us try his special English darts. They were stubby and appeared to be cheaply made, like the rental darts available at most bars. But the weighted, brass tips, light-weight barrel and shaft and flexible flights made for balanced and accurate throwing. Hysterically and as a bonus, he instructed us on how to place the darts in their carrying case. Amazing.
The Take-Away
Admittedly, my thoughts were consumed with the fact that we only do this once a week and I didn’t want a Louie The Lip dart lesson on our Saturday night celebration. In fact, I am sure I had more than one homicidal fantasy during the whole affair. We’ve been back to the Kingshead since and although I am grateful for improved dart technique, I was untroubled by Louie’s absence and his lingering at the dart boards. And what totally blew our minds was that we had no trouble at all taking the darts from or returning them to their case.
We invite you to share in comments your experiences and wisdom on how to handle overly forward people.
Jolly Good People, Posts and Ideas
Shanna Mann’s Change Catalyst offers hard-core strategies for personal change and development. She certainly could have learned me how to deal with Louie The Lip, but she is busy composing stellar posts while running her coaching and consulting business. One could also benefit from reading her Your Next Six Months (Forever), a tour de force on systems to help you design a life where you are the boss of your future.
10 comments about "Dart Lessons With Louie The Lip"
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We are Tammy and CJ, and we are tickled pink you chose to spend time with us. Frolic about
a bit, poke around, and get
your snicker on. Now, get over here, so we can pet you and
feed you nuts.
Darts is an incredible game; and what a skill it is to do it well! Very cool you had some fun with it.
Way to use “we only do this once” in the Take Away portion. Genius! Ha.
Have a fun weekend you two. I am sure you will!
Thanks for your comment, Tony! We have a Jolly good time at it every weekend,except of course when Louie is over there groping us during an unsolicited dart lesson. And yes, we had no idea how brilliant we were using We Only Do This Once in out post. You must be sending us subliminal messages. Hope you have a fun weekend too, Tony!!!
Well guys, I thought darts was a quintessential British game, as I equally considered pubs called the ‘Kings Head’ to be; so I find it quite charming that such things have made it across the pond to the Southern States.
One thing that definitely isn’t quintessentially British though is forwardness – random strangers acting as my new found best friend would be enough to drive me to hide under the nearest pub table. In all honesty though, my inability to deal with people who are too forward would quickly shine through – and all but the thickest skinned of individuals would quickly get the message to leave me alone
Gareth recently posted..The Art of Optimism
Ha! Right you are, Gareth. It is a dart wonder that they’ve made it to Texas. And our part of town lacks a pub/dart downtown-type feel, so we were really grateful for the Kingshead.
And what I am even more grateful for is your candor regarding forwardness. I tried to keep matters light here in this post, but I was out of-my-mind annoyed! So you have helped me feel much better about the whole affair. A hello and a cheers, even a wisecrack and a short story I can handle, but that was way over the top.
Thank you for you comment, Gareth. Houston needs WAY more pubs!
Funny thing is CJ, in the UK we have the impression that that’s how most American’s are – unashamedly friendly to strangers (which is something I have to admit, English reserve aside, I think we all quite admire and aspire to over here).
So whilst I totally sympathise with you, it’s also nice to know that we’re not totally aloof too) you don’t always go for that out and out ‘friendliness’ either (which we often consider overwhelming and under table hiding intrusive).
I don’t do Facebook, but I’ve Google+’ed it – great post. Would like to have a game of darts and a pint with you in the Kingshead one day…and knock out a few Rhoads / Sambora riffs and solos after.
Gareth recently posted..The Art of Optimism
Amazing! And here we are wishing that Americans were a bit less friendly, except on the roads of course. The grass is always greener on the other side;)
Although Humbert Humbert is not a model citizen, I did like his philosophy on the road, “always aloof, but never rude”. It seems perfect for strangers with a build up of gradual trust, but that’s just me.
Thank you so much for Google+ing it, Gareth. That means a lot. And the feeling is mutual about the pint(s)and darts. Rhoads, Sambora certainly and perhaps a bit of Vai, Petrucci and Satriani once we get warmed up?
A vivid recount of a hilarious experience. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Unfortunately we have no advice on how to deal with this situation. As with you, we just go along with it and enjoy the ride, having a good giggle afterwards.
Mark and Jess (Minimalist Couple) recently posted..Do It Now
So happy to have your comment, MAD and Jess, Minimalist Couple! I am just glad people can read and enjoy the story. It’s one that we’ll retell each other for many years, perhaps until we die. And I suppose that is the whole point – having memorable, shared experiences such as these to draw on for the rest of our lives.
My goodness! It’s nearly time to go make more memories! Hope you both have a fantastically fun and zany weekend. Can’t wait to read you next post!
I think you summarised it beautifully with “And I suppose that is the whole point – having memorable, shared experiences such as these to draw on for the rest of our lives.”
We wholeheartedly agree.
Mark and Jess (Minimalist Couple) recently posted..The Onion Analogy
Hello my precious Minimalist, Gumnut Couple! And thank you for your sweet comment. You two are the best!